Day 12 Confidence 

The one guide stone in my life that seems nearly unyielding in my conscious mind is confidence. The view on my own self-esteem stems from my inability to fully love myself. I’ve had my own conditions when it comes to self-love. And, because everything begins inside of us, it was extremely difficult to love others. It is true, if you can’t appreciate yourself you won’t appreciate others and incidentally others will have difficulty appreciating you. I’ve attacked confidence using many angles. I used affirmations, tried make-up, gave in to my lack of ultimate appearance, focused on my weight, kept my nails and toes done at all times, waxed my eyebrows, kept my feminine touch, and a host of various techniques that only focused on the exterior. All of this seemed to change when I understood what really counts; you must have confidence in the spirit and the gifts of the spirit.
The spirit in all of us is pure. It is our own doing when we allow the spirit to be tainted. I will never fully understand how powerful the spirit is but, I do know that the spirit is the only thing that holds any real weight. I went over being made fun of and how it made me feel. I spent many years abusing my mind, body and spirit because I chose to believe in a lie. I blamed how I felt on everything apart of the surface and like a mirror the surface judged me constantly. I was surrounded by people who would never respect me. Having self-love of the spirit is most significant; it is the guiding star that will guide us through every issue we face in humanity.
When I went out yesterday morning to run an errand I did not care to think about what people thought. I wore my t-shirt, tights and a head scarf. Normally I would put sunglasses on because I would be ashamed of the way I looked. The reason for wearing makeup was so I could attempt to cover up the internal shame I felt. Now I only see beauty with or without the mirror. Once you have been set free from an imprisoned mind influenced by worldly standards, you don’t look back and cry over how things were. You look back and know the things that made you cry were able to strengthen who you are to become. My current confidence is in knowing without a doubt I am destined for greatness and the reason I can be so certain is because I believe I can do all things by the power of the spirit. I understand that not all of my readers will believe in Christianity or God. However, I feel that my beliefs are in alignment with those who don’t believe because you too are destined for greatness. You must believe that there is a higher power within you that makes you unstoppable. By believing that you can achieve anything you put your mind to will only be half the battle. Know that beyond the minds comprehension, the battle is already won. Fellow readers, thank you for visiting. Click the like button and share on the links below. Also, please share your experiences and always keep in mind that the happiness project is to help yourself and others.
 

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